
Eulogies for an artist, writer, poet, health warrior, activist who came full circle at age 27
Recalibrating the Universe with Angels for Justice and Kindness
By Marvi Lacar
In 2018, we had some of the happiest and fun dinners as a family with Nikki at the table. The boys called her “ate” [ah-te] – big sister. They often introduced her as “she’s kinda like our sister but not.” So when we broke the news to the boys about Nikki’s passing, they took it very hard. Mateo in particular, cried about how God doesn’t answer prayers.

Marvi and Ben with their boys Kaleb (second from left) and Matteo.
I have a theory about that. In science there is a rule about the law of conservation of energy. That the total energy of a system remains constant. Nikki was kind, fair, generous, fun. She was acutely aware of the beauty surrounding her. She was everything a parent could hope their child would grow up to be. She was also an activist. More than anything she fought against hate and injustice. So my theory is that right now, in this environment that we’re in, the energy of the world is tilting towards injustice and unkindness. The universe needs to recalibrate.
Nature knows not good or evil; it chooses balance. I think that what some believe as God, or a Higher Power or the Force, needed ate Nikki’s energy. God needed better angels. The ones who fought for kindness and fairness in this world. The ones who saw beauty everywhere. The ones who kept their sense of humor no matter the hardships. So while our faith may have been tested during such a painful moment, I hope that we can trust in the empirical laws of nature. The universe needed her energy to find equilibrium.
So while my heart is broken. I’m comforted by the idea that we have a warrior and an activist fighting for us. I believe this deep in my heart that while we may have lost the physical companionship of a sister, a dear friend, a beloved family member, all of us who loved her have been divinely gifted a guardian angel, good energy, the light side of The Force. With Ate Nikki looking out for us, hopefully balance will be restored. #rip
(Marvi Lacar is an award-winning photojournalist and writer who runs her own media and promotions agency together with husband Ben Lowy. Nikki worked as their studio manager.)
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