VALENTINE REFLECTIONS: Chicken Love

By Wendy Friedlander

Love. Crazy, romantic love. It’s the best!

“Oh, I love Johnny. He’s so cute. He treats me so well. He’s got a nice job and a good sense of style. I even like his mom!”

Then Johnny has to work late… again… This time, it’s on your birthday!

Suddenly the hearts above your head crash to the ground. “I hate Johnny. Why is work more important than me? How could he have missed my birthday?”

Eventually, he gets there, bringing your favorite chocolate, a bottle of French wine and roses and suddenly you’re back to “oh, I love Johnny!”

Why? Because crazy love is just that, crazy! By definition, you are coo-coo! At any moment you can fall from crazy in love to just plain crazy Jane.

And while the hormones and highs of romantic love are what we want, what we need is something that can last. And crazy love is too crazy to withstand the test of time.

That is because romantic love lives in the physical plane. The world of matter and the five senses. Where nothing lasts forever and change is guaranteed. The physical plane is a world of action and reaction, good and bad, right and wrong. We call this duality.

In a dualistic world, there are at least two “truths” because our “truth” is limited to what we can see and nobody can see behind their heads.

Romantic love or dualistic love is like chicken love. I love chicken. It’s delicious. Roasted, fried or stewed, the options are endless!

But, do I really Love chicken? No, I eat chicken. I love chicken when it’s on my plate. Do I love chicken when it’s on someone else’s plate. No, I just want their chicken. And while chickens are very cute and lovely animals, I don’t have the same love affair with them when I imagine them running around my yard.

And so, do you want a partner for life you love like a chicken? Not if you want to keep them around for life.

What you need is love beyond expectation and perception. We call this unconditional Love. Something we crave from the moment we are born and something we rarely experience.

Not because we had horrible parents or are “bad” people, but because we live in the world of duality. One that comes with judgment and perception, the two things that take the “un” away from the “conditional” and leave you with chicken love.

We are spiritual beings living in a physical world. Our job is to connect with the original source of creation, that oneness. To see beyond the physical world of the senses and desires and reconnect with the unconditional Love of the divine.

In this respect, a Love relationship is of the highest order. It is our chance to cultivate unconditional Love with another person. To both receive and give the Love. Divine Love. The Love we all need and so rarely experience.

So, how do you find unconditional Love? Start with yourself. You must cultivate Love within to find Love without. And once you find Love inside yourself, you can find that Love in others.

And then, perhaps, cultivate that Love with someone you can also be crazy in love with too, because that’s part of the fun of living in the physical world. Enjoy the goodies, just remember their limits.

Meditation for Self Love:

1. Sit in an easy cross legged position (or upright in a chair)
2. Allow the eyes to gently close and focus on the 3rd eye point between the eyebrows
3. Clasp your hands at the heart level
4. Extend your thumb, index and pinky fingers upward, allowing the tips of each finger to touch the corresponding finger on the opposite hand (right thumb tip to left thumb tip). Leave space between the palms – room for the Love to come in 
5. Chant Wahe Guru Wahe Jio for 11 min (recommended Track 1 on Soul Trance CD by Dr. Joseph Michael Levry, http://rootlight.com/music_soul_trance.htm)
If you are recovering from a broken heart, try track 3 from Blissful Spirit by Dr. Joseph Michael Levry, http://rootlight.com/music_blissful_spirit.htm)

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About the Author:
Upon completing treatment for a rare and agressive cancer, Wendy Friedlander was on a quest to regain her physical and emotional health and ensure she kept it. The book Anticancer, transformed her diet and gave her the impetus to start exercising and meditate. That brought her to yoga. When she had a profound experience in her first Naam Yoga class, she became a dedicated student and eventually traveled the world to become certified in Naam Yoga Therapies in Levels I, II and III and a Harmonyum Healing practitioner. In addition to her studies, she is the co-founder and CTO of Love Through Wisdom, LLC, a match making site based on the ancient spiritual teachings from the Naam lineage.

You can reach Wendy at wendy@lovethroughwisdom.com; her website is notesofgratitude.me